My year is about to get pretty crazy starting tomorrow, so I'm trying to enjoy today - the last day before working 2 part-time jobs while also going to school full-time. But I guess that's what Labor Day honors: hard work! I'm a little apprehensive. Wondering if I bit off more than I can chew.
Still, I wouldn't want it any other way. I love going to college. People go to college (or don't go to college) for all sorts of reasons. For me, it's about the knowledge, community, experiences, and opportunities, and knowing that where God has me is the best place for me to be.
At college, my faith is at times challenged - I feel so alienated as when a professor talks about Christians as if there aren't any sitting in his class. But I have never found these situations to be damaging to my hold on what is true, nor do they shake my belief in God.
If a professor is standing in front of a group of forty kids giving a lecture on how evangelical Christianity is detrimental to scientific progress, I know that it would be happening whether or not I am there to experience it. To be there is an opportunity that I should take advantage of, and I often do. God has used this challenging of my faith to grow me in my knowledge of what I believe; to know the arguments against Him, and how to refute them if He calls me to.
I love how God gives us the chance to be the light someone needs to see. He could change someone's mind, just like that, but he chooses instead to say, "Lauren, I could speak right into this guy's heart and tell him the truth about who I am, but you will be so blessed if you get to talk to Him about me. Here is an opportunity to be involved in my mission! I don't need you to do anything, because I am all-powerful and have other ways and other people I can use, but what an amazing experience you will have if you say yes." I just love that so much.
And I love my jobs, too. Well, I love my library job: my other job as a tutor in my school's Writing Center starts tomorrow, so I have yet to decide if I like it. But in general, I like to work. I like to live a quiet life and work with my hands (1 Thessalonians 4:11-12) and be involved with a community.
So busy is good. Too busy and I might have a nervous breakdown. ;) And I might be sitting here with anxious thoughts running through my head like "What if I can't get my homework done? What if I suck at the tutoring job? What if I start getting confused about my schedule and show up late for work or school?" But it is easily silenced when I think about the incredible sequence of events that have been used by God to lead up to me being in this place, and I know He won't abandon me now.